Friday, September 21, 2012

Do I Really Have to Share?

We have been trying to teach our little boys to share. This can be a difficult concept. We want to teach them that they must share their toys with each other, but we also want to make sure that one of them does not use the idea of sharing as an excuse to demand that his brother give up the toy that he wants.
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Unfortunately even adults struggle with this concept. As Christians we are to share with those who are less fortunate than we are, yet we must also point out that it is not right to demand that others share their possessions simply because we want them. Consider the tenth commandment: “Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour's.” (Exodus 20:17)
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Rather than teaching our boys that they have to give up a toy anytime anyone asks for it, we are trying to teach them the concept of charity and showing love for each other. One of those ways has been to encourage them to find another toy to trade with their brother so that they can get the toy they want. As we have implemented this concept we have also had to tell the bigger boys that they are not allowed to force the little ones to trade if they do not want to nor should all the little ones gang up on the big one to take away his toy.
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What about adults? Do they have the right to demand that others share their “toys“? There is a huge difference between charity and forced compliance. Charity is giving out of love. That is what I hope to teach my children as I encourage them to share. Forced demands, however, get results based on strength rather than love. Compliance is simply the result of a threat. For example if someone threatens you with a weapon and asks for all the “toys” in your wallet, you do not give them the wallet out of charity but because of force. Another command clearly deals with that. “Thou shalt not steal.” (Exodus 20:15)
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This actually brings us to an important question: can forced charity really be called charity? The reason that I am asking this question is because if someone is giving out of compulsion rather than out of love- though the giving may actually be benefiting someone else- it is not actually real charity.
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I can condition my children to respond in a certain manner, but as I teach them to share, I want them to learn the concept of love so that even if they want to play with a toy, they would love their brother enough to let him play with it as well. I also hope that they carry those concepts into adulthood so that they are willing to share with those in need, but also not so selfish as to demand that others share with them.
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Galatians 5:14 says, “For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.” Loving neighbors will not demand that others share their excess, but loving neighbors will also help those who really are in need. A Biblical concept of love should help us to share without being greedy.

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